best vegan meatloaf recipe ever image
Lolagirl
Every time we have a family dinner it's the same conversations. MIL always starts these debates that we all clearly have different opinions about.
Examples:
my fiancé is vegan and I rarely eat meat or animal products and his family doesn't agree with it. They always try to make us eat meat at dinner and ask us why we have those diets and when we try to explain our reasons they won't hear it and make us feel like we are bad for not eating meat.
Then the dreaded CANCER conversation. They always bring it up. It has been proven that eating lots of fast food and junk food is linked to cancer and other diseases. They always put me on the spot and when I reply they shut me up and basically say all those facts are bogus and getting a disease is like Russian roulette you can get it no matter what you eat or what kind of lifestyle you have.
Politics, faith and religion..it's really just table manners and I don't think anyone should ever talk about those topics while having family dinners! But like usual each person has their personal views and things always get heated with everyone because its MIL favorite topic of conversation.
His family thinks they know everything and try to debunk everything and think their opinions are the only correct way of thinking. I hate going to dinners because they always push me into the conversations. We always just leave right after eating because we don't want to deal with it. They never have any facts to back up what they are trying to prove, but they always think they are right and know everything.
Mermaids and aliens..wtf?? MIL and BIL always argue about their existence. Mermaids! Are you kidding me?? MIL thinks they are real. That's fine with me but BIL thinks she's nuts and they always argue about it. Then they try to drag me and my fiancé into it. MIL ends up upset.
It's always MIL who starts it all. When I tried to explain that I feel uncomfortable with certain topics, they basically say I am too sensitive and family debates are good to have. Please help be we don't want to cut them off but my fiancé and I are sick if it. When he tries to talk to them about not having these conversations anymore then another argument comes up because they are just kind of closed minded and don't care about anyone else's opinions. Are we handling this wrong?
I usually sit there quietly! And I'm not a vegan, I just don't really like meat. What's so wrong with that?
My fiancé does take my side. He doesn't want to go to family dinners any more. Especially because the try to tell us how to raise our child..
Answer
LOL Are you living my life?! Seriously...this is what happens in my family as well, only it's my mother who always trying to get my husband into conversations or debates that she knows will get him going. It can be a big problem, and for a long time, my husband didn't even want to go over to my parents house because it was always a big, stressful situation or confrontation.
So, my husband and I started therapy about a year ago, and this is one of the issues that we have been working on. Our therapist has given us some great advice, and I am happy to say that after employing the suggestions and practices that she has given to us, we enjoy lots of nice dinners with my parents now.
First things first...because they are my parents, it is MY job to be my husband's advocate. My loyalties must be with my husband at all times. This was tough for me, because I am an only child and very close to my parents, but I realized that my husband is really my immediate family now, and my parents are secondary to my marriage, so I cannot allow them to do things that will purposely drive a wedge into my marriage. I had a sit down talk with my parents, explaining the situation, how it makes me feel and how it makes my husband feel, and as afraid as I was to have the conversation, in the end, it went very well, because my parents love me enough to realize that they were hurting me by creating turmoil with my husband.
Secondly, my husband had to practice not getting roped into these debates and conversations. This was tough for him, but he learned to either be quiet or to change the subject in a really slick way...the therapist helped him with that. The trick is when these debates first start, you have to diffuse them by turning the attention to something else, like asking your mother in law where she got the recipe for the fabulous meatloaf you just ate, or if she has any advice on what you can do to keep your house a little cleaner...things that will work to her own feelings of greatness and make her feel as though she has something to teach that you want to learn. If she attempts to avoid this type of distraction, then you just have to be as agreeable as possible, because she is looking for a fight...you have to say things like "you know, I can understand your point" or "you have a really good arguement, there"...this will diffuse the situation because people like this thrive and feed off of the dramatic confrontation, and if you don't allow the confrontation to happen, then they will get bored and move on.
Lastly, if none of this works, then it will be your husband's job to stand up for you and sit down with his family and let them know that you will not be spending as much time together unless they can "behave". When he comes out on your side and basically says that if things don't change you guys won't be around, then it's likely his parents/family will rethink thier behaviour.
On a final note, I would suggest that maybe you and your husband see a therapist that can help you with this. I only say this because a good family/couples therapist will have more in depth suggestions for you that will help a lot more than what I can give to you in this short space. You'll be amazed at what you can learn from a good therapist, and if you don't get these things under control now, then it will only get worse and start to harm your marriage. Good luck!!!
LOL Are you living my life?! Seriously...this is what happens in my family as well, only it's my mother who always trying to get my husband into conversations or debates that she knows will get him going. It can be a big problem, and for a long time, my husband didn't even want to go over to my parents house because it was always a big, stressful situation or confrontation.
So, my husband and I started therapy about a year ago, and this is one of the issues that we have been working on. Our therapist has given us some great advice, and I am happy to say that after employing the suggestions and practices that she has given to us, we enjoy lots of nice dinners with my parents now.
First things first...because they are my parents, it is MY job to be my husband's advocate. My loyalties must be with my husband at all times. This was tough for me, because I am an only child and very close to my parents, but I realized that my husband is really my immediate family now, and my parents are secondary to my marriage, so I cannot allow them to do things that will purposely drive a wedge into my marriage. I had a sit down talk with my parents, explaining the situation, how it makes me feel and how it makes my husband feel, and as afraid as I was to have the conversation, in the end, it went very well, because my parents love me enough to realize that they were hurting me by creating turmoil with my husband.
Secondly, my husband had to practice not getting roped into these debates and conversations. This was tough for him, but he learned to either be quiet or to change the subject in a really slick way...the therapist helped him with that. The trick is when these debates first start, you have to diffuse them by turning the attention to something else, like asking your mother in law where she got the recipe for the fabulous meatloaf you just ate, or if she has any advice on what you can do to keep your house a little cleaner...things that will work to her own feelings of greatness and make her feel as though she has something to teach that you want to learn. If she attempts to avoid this type of distraction, then you just have to be as agreeable as possible, because she is looking for a fight...you have to say things like "you know, I can understand your point" or "you have a really good arguement, there"...this will diffuse the situation because people like this thrive and feed off of the dramatic confrontation, and if you don't allow the confrontation to happen, then they will get bored and move on.
Lastly, if none of this works, then it will be your husband's job to stand up for you and sit down with his family and let them know that you will not be spending as much time together unless they can "behave". When he comes out on your side and basically says that if things don't change you guys won't be around, then it's likely his parents/family will rethink thier behaviour.
On a final note, I would suggest that maybe you and your husband see a therapist that can help you with this. I only say this because a good family/couples therapist will have more in depth suggestions for you that will help a lot more than what I can give to you in this short space. You'll be amazed at what you can learn from a good therapist, and if you don't get these things under control now, then it will only get worse and start to harm your marriage. Good luck!!!
You think i should be a vegetarian?
Q. I have done i before but i lasted 2 weeks,
But i really want to be one because i love animals :( and i have just recently quit smoking so i wanna put my goal on something else,
could some one please write me out a guide to be one,
Or give me the url for a guide to take me through step by step,?
Giving best answer!
But i really want to be one because i love animals :( and i have just recently quit smoking so i wanna put my goal on something else,
could some one please write me out a guide to be one,
Or give me the url for a guide to take me through step by step,?
Giving best answer!
Answer
To me Loving animals is a Great Reason to be a vegetarian. It is not hard to be one and keep being one. First you must make a commitment to yourself that you not going to eat their bodies anymore even if you like how they taste. You are going to put their lives before your taste buds. I think loving animals and remembering that will keep you going. The first month is the hardest and only because you are used to eating animals. It is habit like anything else. Every day decide what you are having for breakfast . That is easy, Breakfast:cereal, oatmeal, toast,waffles, pancakes, english muffins, donuts, also mock breakfast meats as veggie bacon , veggie patties etc.
Lunch: make a sandwich ( no meat), a bean burrito, bean taco, veggie wrap, humus, falafel on pita, salads, soups, use mock meats as veggie burgers, veggie dogs with beans, veggie sausage etc
Dinner: Pasta a zillion ways, marinara, with pesto, alfredo,prima vera, with beans, veggie lasagna, or have sauteed or roasted veggies over rice, a curry dish, use mock meats to make almost any "meat dish", stews, soups,casseroles, potatoes( fried, roasted, mashed, boiled), tamales, veggie meatballs, veggie meatloaf with mashed potatoes, Tofurkey with pecan cranberry,salads, and even veggie sloppy joes.
These are just a few ideas... eat fresh fruits as apples , bananas, berries and drink fruit juice as OJ fortified with calcium
snack on nuts as almonds, peanuts, cashews, ect
snack on raw veggies as baby carrots or celery ( and use salad dressing as a dip) , I eat lots of raw veggies as well as cooked ones
If you can begin to change to soy or almond milks(they all taste different so it will be trial and error) I like Regular unflavored Silk ( refrigerator section) and Almond breeze chocolate (not refrigerated)
Things to avoid anything with Gelatin, anything with L-Cysteine, Carmine, and Confectioners glaze( the last 2 are bug guts found in lots of candies), avoid any beef, chicken or animal broths in soups and many times in rice dishes, and in cheese make sure it says non animal rennet ( otherwise the cow is killed as animal rennet comes from their 4th stomach).
I would say start here and everyday think to yourself I will not eat an animal today. Soon you will not even think of ever eating one again because your heart is in it and the more you know, the more commited you will be. Do not panic if you make a mistake , just fix it for the next time and keep going.
Good luck and stick with it ( I read some of your other questions and I would say do not try to be a vegan yet, yes you can begin to buy non leather shoes and bags as what you have wears out, and use products not tested on animals, but do not put that much pressure on yourself all at once)
Please email me if I can help or answer questions about any products.
I also suggest you look over PETA's website and read all as well as
check out vegweb.com for recipes
One last thing Vegetarians do not eat any type of Fish ever including shellfish. Fish are living animals until they are killed and gutted for someone to eat them and absolutely not vegetarian. You probably know that, but some people are confused.
Vegan Forever
To me Loving animals is a Great Reason to be a vegetarian. It is not hard to be one and keep being one. First you must make a commitment to yourself that you not going to eat their bodies anymore even if you like how they taste. You are going to put their lives before your taste buds. I think loving animals and remembering that will keep you going. The first month is the hardest and only because you are used to eating animals. It is habit like anything else. Every day decide what you are having for breakfast . That is easy, Breakfast:cereal, oatmeal, toast,waffles, pancakes, english muffins, donuts, also mock breakfast meats as veggie bacon , veggie patties etc.
Lunch: make a sandwich ( no meat), a bean burrito, bean taco, veggie wrap, humus, falafel on pita, salads, soups, use mock meats as veggie burgers, veggie dogs with beans, veggie sausage etc
Dinner: Pasta a zillion ways, marinara, with pesto, alfredo,prima vera, with beans, veggie lasagna, or have sauteed or roasted veggies over rice, a curry dish, use mock meats to make almost any "meat dish", stews, soups,casseroles, potatoes( fried, roasted, mashed, boiled), tamales, veggie meatballs, veggie meatloaf with mashed potatoes, Tofurkey with pecan cranberry,salads, and even veggie sloppy joes.
These are just a few ideas... eat fresh fruits as apples , bananas, berries and drink fruit juice as OJ fortified with calcium
snack on nuts as almonds, peanuts, cashews, ect
snack on raw veggies as baby carrots or celery ( and use salad dressing as a dip) , I eat lots of raw veggies as well as cooked ones
If you can begin to change to soy or almond milks(they all taste different so it will be trial and error) I like Regular unflavored Silk ( refrigerator section) and Almond breeze chocolate (not refrigerated)
Things to avoid anything with Gelatin, anything with L-Cysteine, Carmine, and Confectioners glaze( the last 2 are bug guts found in lots of candies), avoid any beef, chicken or animal broths in soups and many times in rice dishes, and in cheese make sure it says non animal rennet ( otherwise the cow is killed as animal rennet comes from their 4th stomach).
I would say start here and everyday think to yourself I will not eat an animal today. Soon you will not even think of ever eating one again because your heart is in it and the more you know, the more commited you will be. Do not panic if you make a mistake , just fix it for the next time and keep going.
Good luck and stick with it ( I read some of your other questions and I would say do not try to be a vegan yet, yes you can begin to buy non leather shoes and bags as what you have wears out, and use products not tested on animals, but do not put that much pressure on yourself all at once)
Please email me if I can help or answer questions about any products.
I also suggest you look over PETA's website and read all as well as
check out vegweb.com for recipes
One last thing Vegetarians do not eat any type of Fish ever including shellfish. Fish are living animals until they are killed and gutted for someone to eat them and absolutely not vegetarian. You probably know that, but some people are confused.
Vegan Forever
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